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Me in the Mirror

Stand and gaze. Don’t turn away. Look yourself in the eyes as you stand in front of the mirror. Yes, that’s you, the image of you. Say it to yourself “Me in the Mirror.” How does it feel? Are you happy with what you see and more importantly, are you “happy with how you feel” as you stand and gaze at you?

There are people who cannot look at themselves in the mirror. For reasons “known” to them, they cannot linger and look. It doesn’t feel right. They use the mirror as their preparation tool; the tool that prepares their image for the public, however, the real image is what they feel. Despite what the image reflects, the feeling doesn’t match. The image may be perfect or imperfect depending upon the eyes that behold it, and yet that is of no consequence, because there is a feeling, that lingers like a cloud that hovers over a sunny day.

What are the feelings that make you uncomfortable when you look in the mirror? Can you identify them? Is there a mental image that is attached to the feeling? Is it shame and if so why not address it? Is it guilt? If it’s guilt then what choices are available to alleviate it? Are you angry at yourself or someone else? If it’s anger, how long will you allow the feeling to tax your soul? Are you disappointed at the choices you’ve made? If that is the case, are you willing to make better choices starting right now? Are you fearful? If so, can you differentiate whether it’s perceived or real?

Whatever the feeling may be, you must stand in front of the mirror and “admit” that feeling to yourself. Admitting is the crucial first step. You must be willing to do this or you will not make any progress. You are not being asked to solve the feeling, you are merely being asked to admit there is a feeling that weighs heavy upon your heart and soul.

What is so ironic, is once you’ve acknowledge the feeling; the power that you’ve given this feeling begins to lessen. Yes, the root of the feeling still needs pruning and a healing must occur, however, “your yoke becomes easy and your burden light” because you have summoned the courage to look in the mirror and give a voice to the feeling that has held you captive. The feeling wants to be acknowledged. It can be likened to a noisy wheel that will squeak until it gets oil.

Standing and looking in the mirror is challenging especially if the feelings have been “resting without peace” for years. You have been accustomed to doing what is required for hygiene and general appearance and moving on. Yet, a few “baby steps” will make all the difference in the world:

1. For five (5) days, stand with a TIMER in front of a mirror for thirty (30) seconds.


2. FOCUS on your EYES ONLY!


3. When the time is up STOP!


4. TAKE thirty (30) seconds to write THREE (3) WORDS on what you FELT!


5. After five (5) days, you will have fifteen (15) words.


6. Write out the definition of each word at your leisure.


7. If you decide to speak your truth, you now have WORDS for your FEELINGS!

Now that you have the words to describe the feelings that won’t allow you to look in the mirror, you must admit, it no longer seems so scary. Why doesn’t it seem scary? Because you have stood in the mirror, acknowledged your feelings and attached words. Now, what will you do with what you know?

Me in the Mirror

You Are Aging

2 Corinthians 4:16: “So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.”

Technology has been the Creator’s gift to humanity. The tools, resources and information that exist today are extraordinary. However, with all of our advancements, the process of aging cannot be stopped. It may be slowed by good food and good health but the truth of the matter is we all are aging. Yet, aging doesn’t mean countless medications and hundreds of hours spent with a physician. There is no dictate that states our minds must lose their luster and our bodies crumble under the weight of a number. Many enjoy a productive life as the hair turns gray while the spirit glistens like gold.

The medical profession is still without consensus on what keeps us alive. Yes, we know the basic of good healthy living. However, there are millions who batter their bodies with drinking, smoking and improper eating yet still live relatively free of major diseases. Within the medical profession this remains a mystery. Is it genetics, good luck or the Creator? We know the answer to that question!

Whatever your belief, a sense of humor as you age is extremely important. Without laughter regarding your aches and pains, you will age faster and with much remorse and bitterness.  As Proverbs 15:15 states: “All the days of the afflicted are evil, but the cheerful of heart has a continual feast.”  Accept the fact that you are aging with grace. While you may feel somewhat afflicted in spirit because your body doesn’t always respond in the manner you would like, be of good cheer, because with the Creator, your feast of the spirit is continuous.

 You Are Aging When:

1. “Smoking a Joint” means putting heat on your knees.


2. “Tuning In” is increasing the volume on your hearing aids.


3. “Botox and Bowel Movements” dominate conversations.


4. You think “Snoop Dog” is a friend of Lucy and Charlie Brown.


5. A “Squirt” means you leak when you laugh.


6. “Your Posse” is called “Cane City.”


7. “Your Grandchildren” want your clothes because they are “retro.”


8. “A Night Out” means sleeping without waking.


9. “Laughter” is not the best medicine without your medications.


10. “Waking at 7 am” and feeling half the day is gone.


11. Small children ask if you remember “covered wagons.”


12. An apple a day won’t get it. You need a bushel.


13. When you begin to wash and reuse plastic storage bags.


14. When going to a buffet; you bring plastic containers.


15. When driving 25 miles per hour is too fast.

You Are Aging

Where There Is Your Will

It completely belongs to you and is under your full dominion and control. It has been with you since your birth and most likely will follow you through eternity. It has caused immense joy and regrettable sorrow; yet many still do not grasp the magnitude of its importance. It is the driving force of your soul and the single element of your spirit that your Creator refuses to alter. It is “your will.” You have heard countless times “where there’s a will, there is a way.” However, “where there is your will, there is your way.”  Your will helps and hinders you. It is helpful in your spiritual awakening as you will require its fortitude to “break down” firmly cemented thought patterns. It can hinder you if allowed to roam without your firm and loving guidance.

We all have witnessed a child with a very strong will. In some situations we applaud the child’s will, however, when the will is out of control, we know there is a problem.  Your will can sometimes be likened to a child who has gone undisciplined. Imparting discipline to an undisciplined child can be challenging at best. The child can be stubborn and many times when your frustration level has reached its maximum, you want to give up. This is your undisciplined will: an inner child that needs you to impart your guidance.

Your will knows that it is “free.” It is aware it is the element of your soul that your Creator allows you to “reign.” However, what your will doesn’t take into consideration is that you are free, however, your will isn’t. It must abide by your rules. This must be kept in the forefront of your mind especially while rebuilding your spiritual connection to your higher self. Because your will has been allowed to roam undisciplined for such a long time, it fights back when you attempt to bring it under control. Remember, it is like a child that has gone unattended and is not accustomed to having persistent discipline and accountability.

While at times you may feel there is a “war waging” between your “good will” and your “untamed will”, remember you are the “parent” of this child inside and it is within your power to “win” the war.  You must balance focus and determination to win against your will. You must erase the voices of your will that want to do what it wants to do. Your focus and determination are crucial. Spirituality requires us to be focused and determined and most importantly to control our will. Our will wants to be instantly gratified. It doesn’t want to wait for anything. It wants to do as it wants to do. It wants to be the best; however it can get off course without your guidance, without your control. Your will needs you to take control. Your will requires that you lead and not follow.

Controlling your will allows you to handle what lies ahead.  Remember, you are not controlled, you are the controller. Your will is free, however, it is only as free as you determine it to be.  Your Creator has given “you free reign” and wants you to command your will and not your will commanding you. If you command as you should, then “where there is your will, there will always be a way.”

Where There Is Your Will

What Price for Your Success?

Have you compromised your success with the selling of your integrity, your character and your soul? Did you pawn your moral compass to move unguided and without accountability?  Can you enjoy the spoils of your victories, while feeling barren because you know the manner in which they were accomplished doesn’t allow for a full appreciation? Then the question is quite simple “what price for your success?”

In the early days of your journey, you spoke of “never selling your soul.” You were quite confident in your position. You wanted to compete with class, mutual benefit and uncompromising values. You had witnessed those who had fallen prey to greed and vanity. You were determined to keep your distance from “those people.” You wanted to be different.  You claimed you would always travel the high road because you wanted to assure yourself, that when your time in the game had reached its end, you wanted to know and feel that you had done it with the highest of character and moral substance. You wanted to be proud of “how” you achieved and allow the “number” of achievements to stand on their own.  However, as you see, know and most definitely feel, “you didn’t follow your moral compass” and despite your material acquisitions and public adoration, you have been lost as you traveled “south” of your soul.

Recognizing greed and vanity as your chauffeurs; you take a closer view of the passing landscape and realize you need “emergency roadside assistance” as you are in full “cardiac arrest of the soul.” This emergency is of epic proportion as your “present and future” is at stake. You actually believed that you were the “chosen one” and you would escape all that you had intentionally done to yourself and more importantly “to others.” You actually believed that you could lie, cheat and steal and not suffer any consequences. This was the “game” and everyone played it this way. You were merely doing what was necessary and by any means necessary to achieve your success. However, you realize that what you “sold” for the price of your success and what you have “received” has left you empty and unfulfilled. You have the “trappings without the joy” and the “success without the fulfillment.” What now is the true price for your success?

Your true price for your success is an “emptiness that cannot be filled by people, places or things.” You have judged your accomplishments through” the eyes of others” as you view yourself “through your own.”  Would your soul appear “unforgiving” if it asked “as a fool should you suffer gladly?”

Should you suffer gladly or should you be able to say “I’m sorry” and then be “free to go?” You felt, as many do, that you would be judged by your Creator when your time had expired. However, you have become aware that your “conscious” has no timeframe and has “quietly awakened.”  Your conscious has been a “witness” to your choices and never interfered with your “free will.” However, you heard the “voice” on many occasions and ignored the “whispers.” You made a “choice not to listen” and pushed the voice aside. ” You bought and sold your “soul” without giving consideration that eventually you would have to pay, however you gambled that it would be “later rather than sooner.”

Only you can answer the question “what price for your success?” and more importantly “is the cost worth the price of your soul?”

What Price for Your Success?

The Problem and the Solution

It’s pressing up against your mind. It murmurs in between your thoughts and hangs as if it were a picture on a wall. It smolders behind your eyes and makes them droop with despair. It’s an unsolved problem.

It soothes your soul and makes your heart eager to sing a song of victory. It waits patiently for you to turn to it as its primary existence is to make certain you always have a seat at the feast. It’s the problem’s solution.

They are both in the same place and at the same time. They both wait with anticipation as to which you will serve. One fills you with fear, worry and doubt while the other offers solace for your burdened heart.

When you think of what you need to solve, how do you feel? Does your spirit feel a sense of despair or is there a joy as you remember the words of Paul when he declared: “I glory in my infirmities?” Most think when hearing these words; that it refers strictly to an illness. However, an infirmity is any situation that allows the opportunity to choose whom you will serve. An infirmity allows you to show you where your faith is planted. It allows you to “walk the walk when you have talked the talk.” An infirmity says to you “show me your works so that you may see your faith.” Thus the reason Paul gloried in his opportunities to show who he would serve and you must understand that it was not easy for Paul as it is not easy for you.

When you have a problem to solve, you have on the right hand the power of the Creator and on the left hand the delusions of a destroyer. The Creator calms you and continues to remind you that all is well regardless of what your eyes are telling you. The destroyer causes you to sink into depression as you believe the images that it shows. Both the problem and the solution rest in your thoughts.

When you realize that you have the choice on which altar you will stand, the sense of despair begins to lessen. You realize that the Creator has never let you down and never will. You understand that the destroyer has a job to do and is extremely good at creating this sense of doom and despair as it wants you to believe that all is not well. It causes you to wonder if your faith is solid as you feel the weight of your problem.

However, if you trust the Creator and dismiss the destroyer, you are using your free will which gives you the chance to glory in your infirmity and focus your attention on the solution instead of the problem. This is all the Creator ask of you, to keep your eyes centered on him and not be dismayed by the illusions of the destroyer. So, please remember, both the problem and the solution are within you and it is up to you on which you will focus.

The Problem and the Solution

I Appreciate That

In life we are met with obstacles. Obstacles are not things; obstacles are people. People who at times, deliberately want to get in the way. Some believe they are justified; others who because of their views and opinions on life, just want to block us from our goals. And some are simply jealous that you are attempting to change the course of your journey and deep within themselves, they may feel you are leaving them behind.

Instead of getting angry and holding resentment that only makes you suffer; how about turning the other cheek and telling yourself you appreciate them. No need to tell them; what you want to do is calm yourself, be still and repeat the following:

I appreciate that you have tried to take me down. Because of that I realized how many times I am able to get up.

I appreciate that you have tried to put your stamp on my life. Because of that I am creating my own stamp on my life.

I appreciate that you have said what I could and could not do. Because of that I am now doing what I know will benefit me and my loved ones.

I appreciate that you have spread lies about me. Because of that I found the truth about me.

I appreciate that you tried to turn everyone against me. Because of that I know who my true friends are.

I appreciate that you attempt to twist my words and my feelings. Because of that I have gotten clearer in my communication and now say what I mean and mean what I say.

I appreciate that you laughed when I freely discussed my goals. Because of that I understand fully what the Bible states “Do not cast your pearls before swine as they will turn and render you.”

I appreciate that you don’t believe in me. Because of that I learned to believe in myself.

I appreciate that when I was down you wanted to rudely lecture instead of helping. Because of that I learned to take better care of myself and know who to ask for help.

I appreciate that you placed stop signs in front of me. Because of that I was able to navigate another direction which proved to be much better than expected.

I appreciate all of the things you did for me and to me as it has given me a greater understanding of me. It has fueled my fire to ensure that I do well now and in the future. You have no idea how much I appreciate all of the things that you have done to me and in the end for me. You have been a blessing for my growth and for my personal development. Without your inadvertent assistance I would have been fine, however, your actions inspired me and definitely made a difference. So, please know…I Appreciate That!

I Appreciate That

How Did You Use Your Gift?

It is judgment day.  You stand before your Creator making a case for all the sins you did not commit and explaining your reasons for the sins you did.

You speak of the good will toward others and how effectively you used faith, hope, charity and love to the best of your ability. You state that you have lived according to the Ten Commandments and feel very strongly that your place should be secure within the gates of the Holy Kingdom.

However, as you stand before your Creator, his enthusiasm doesn’t seem to match yours. You are quite surprised as this is not what you were expecting since you had lived your life according to his principles. You search your thoughts seeking more situations which give you the leverage you need to finalize your entry into the Kingdom, however, none come forward. As you stand before the Creator, you question why your entry isn’t automatic. Then the Creator speaks.

“My Beloved, all of the things you have mentioned are true. Your sins have never been a concern as I know what my children will do before they consider doing it. Speaking on faith, hope, charity and love, there isn’t a question that you did well, I’m happy that you feel good about your accomplishments. Yes, you followed the Ten Commandments and you lived according to them and that is highly commendable. You have lived by what was written and that is good.

However, the question I’m about to ask you has brought a sense of confusion to many of my children and they seem quite astonished that the question is asked. When I ask this question, I am asking so that I can better understand how you handle your “free will.” I give you free will so that I am not controlling. I never want to control my children as that is not being a good parent and as I am your Creator, I truly want all my children to know, that I am here for their guidance, however, I will never dictate your decisions. I leave you to make your own decisions and if you need me, I am always here for you.”

“With all of that said My Beloved, there is still one question that has to be asked of you and that is “how did you use the gift I gave you?” “I gave you a gift that was created especially for you. Yes, you did live your life according to the principles of the Kingdom. Yes, you followed the Ten Commandments and you were strong in your faith. However, did you realize that the gift I gave you to use was a gift that would have helped more people than you could have ever imagined. Your gift would have given joy and comfort in the highest and lowest places. Your gift would have changed the lives of people you would have never met. Your gift would have been used for generations. Your gift would have meant so much to me if you had used it. Yet, my beloved, you were afraid to use your gift. You were afraid to take the risk of stepping out on faith for you. You were afraid to test the laws of success for you. You hid under the guise of helping others, while your gift remained unused. You did not trust that the gift I gave to you was to be used while you were on earth.”

“You and I both know that you allowed fear, doubt and worry to stop you from using your gift. Yes, what you accomplished by helping others was a good thing and it is not being overlooked. However, the real issue is that the gift I gave you to use was left behind and with that a lot of what had been planned was also left behind. So, only you can answer the question “why didn’t you use the gift I gave you?”

How Did You Use Your Gift?

Do You Care If You Are Liked?

I was listening to a sports commentator and he was speaking about professional athletes who are the best in their chosen careers; yet they are not embraced by the public as likable. The most interesting observation made during the discussion was these athletes didn’t care if you liked them.They honestly don’t care if they are liked by us. They have never bowed to our societal pressure of being more approachable, more lovable and more open to the media.  They seem to be emotionally distant except when they are doing their job. They don’t care what we think of them. They only care that they win.

 

Yet, many of them lead very balanced lives with regard to their humanity toward others and especially their generosity to those family members they cherish. A lot of what they contribute goes unpublished in the local and national media, because they don’t want you to know, so they allow the misconceptions to be discussed without rebuttal.

 

Yet, the majority of them are adored and highly respected by their teammates. The teammates speak very kindly of their character.  They emphatically state “what you think you know of the athlete is not who they are.” A poll among professional athletes was taken regarding these athletes and the curious result was while they were disliked by the public, the overwhelming majority of the athletes polled wanted the athlete on their team. It was their work ethic that was admired, the desire to maximize their full potential and wanting to get the best out of them while the opportunity was present and upon retiring not having any regrets.

 

So, based on these results, it seems that maybe none of us should really concern ourselves about being liked.

 

Most likely, the majority of us will ever experience a 9^th inning home-run, a putt to win a golf championship, a Hail Mary to win a football game or a last second shot to win a basketball final.

We will never know that feeling. We can only imagine. Yet, while we may never experience that accomplishment, what we can learn is that while we may need to get along with co-workers and associates, we don’t have to be liked to excel in our chosen professions. 

 

How important is it for you to be liked?  If you excel within your chosen profession, must you feign an emotional connection with your associates or managers to move within the company? Do you believe that you should “glad-hand” with your Boss in order to be considered for that promotion you desire?  What can we learn from these athletes that would translate to our working environment? What is the take away from the poll results that would help us reach our full potential?

 

The overwhelming factor is that they are good at what they do. They really are. They just don’t care if we like them. Isn’t that something? They make millions of dollars each year and they don’t care if we like them? Their faces grace the pages of many magazines and publications and they don’t care if we like them? If they walked into a room, we would stare and they really wouldn’t care one way or the other? They don’t want to be liked by us and they could care less.

 

What does this mean for us? It means that what our parents told us as children is correct: Mind your manners and be kind. However, maybe they should have ended the statement by also stating that if you have been kind and were mannerly, then maybe it really is okay that people not like you. They should have also stated that maybe just maybe…one can fully reach their potential and not be adored and liked by the masses. However, at the end of the day, most likely you will be respected.

Do You Care If You Are Liked?

Are You Sure Of What You Hope For?

You hope. You pray. You wait. However, the question becomes “are you sure of what you hope for? It’s a ritual with you. You have the dream, the strategy and you are willing to work until your hands are numb to achieve your goal. However, deep within the recesses of your thoughts, you hear the nagging nudges of doubt.

You know well their song of silence. It begins with a feeling. A small innocuous feeling; that begins to float against your mind and then looms ever so close to every step that moves you closer to your goal. The feeling hovers like a dark cloud that slowly moves to block out the sun. The dance of doubt has arrived and you are not sure of what you hope for.

This is the moment that you must be mindful of. This is the time when doubt begins to assail your thoughts of health; wealth and happiness. This is the time when doubt and her army march toward your soul with a purpose and intent that if allowed will overwhelm you. The song that was once silent is now blasting through your wall of confidence and you begin your own dance of not being sure what you are hoping for.

The two worlds within your soul have collided and you the owner of your own soul; feel the struggle. You know that you should not listen to the song of doubt; however, because it sings so loudly you cannot hear the small voice that is whispering to you that all is alright. Doubt has your thoughts and you listen.  Doubt has your heart and you wail. Doubt has your mind and you crumble. Doubt has your eyes as you view the false appearance before you and you believe what you see.

Where is your certainty of what you hope for? Where is the faith that you know waits for your to call? Why do you stumble within the gap of your divided soul when the light of faith is always there? Why are you not sure of what you have hoped for?

You have done what you were supposed to do in order to achieve your desires. You have been diligently taking care of the steps that are required to be successful. So, if you have done all of the things that lead to your success, then why are you not sure of what you have hoped for? Why do you doubt because the picture isn’t appearing as you think it should be? Why are you melting under the intense gaze of fear? Why are you not sure of what you have hoped for?

You know the answer to this question, don’t you? You know the thoughts that should be cemented across your mind. You know that you should be certain of what you have hoped for. You should know that what you have hoped for is yours for the taking. All that is required of you is that you are certain when you ask. All that is asked of you is that you have faith. All that has ever been asked of you is that once you ask you never question whether you will receive.

As a child of the universe; your request if for the good of you, and all concerned, will be supplied. Be certain of what you hope for; it is already yours.

Are You Sure Of What You Hope For?